Taste Testers Couldn't Even Finish This Frozen Pizza

We've all heard the old saying: "There's no such thing as bad sex or bad pizza." While we won't speak to the first, we will speak to the second. And unfortunately, according to recent taste tests, it simply isn't true. I.e. bad pizza definitely exists. More specifically, bad frozen pizza definitely exists.

Some of the foodie experts at Mashed put the most popular frozen pizza brands to the test, from Tombstone to Amy's to Trader Joe's, and then ranked them from best to worst based on the three factors that make up every pizza: sauce, crust, and cheese. While Newman's Own took the top spot thanks to its flavorful and perfectly doughy yet crispy crust, others didn't fare so well. In fact, there was one frozen pizza that our taste testers were so disappointed in, they didn't even finish let alone reach for a second slice. Here's which pie you might want to avoid the next time you're shopping the frozen aisle.

You've likely seen Celeste pizzas in the freezer at the grocery store — but you might want to leave them there. "Celeste is so bad, it's almost painful to write about," our testers cautioned, adding that even a seven-year-old could make a better pizza. Despite the fact that the brand claims to use 100 percent real cheese, our testers say it tasted strange and had an unpleasant gooey texture. The pizza for one is like "a giant Bagel Bite that really lost its way" and our testers tossed it after just two bites.

They aren't the only ones who aren't fans of Celeste frozen pizzas. According to many one-star reviews on Amazon, the cheese truly is questionable at best and inedible at worst, and the crust gets soggy when cooked. "I cannot really do justice to describing what came out of my microwave, but the soggy, gooey mess that was on my plate was worse than something out of a Cronenberg film," one person complained. "As far as frozen pizza, I'm not that hard to please, but this was an abomination."